GOODNESS GRACIOUS BIG DUMPSTER FIRE

I CAN NOW CATEGORICALLY SAY JOB SEARCH IN 2024/2025 IS A BIG DUMPSTER FIRE. NOT THE BIGGEST I’VE EVER SEEN, WHAT WITH WHAT’S BEEN HAPPENING AROUND THE WORLD IN THE LAST FEW YEARS FROM WAR IN UKRAINE TO EXECUTIVE ORDERS, OR FARAGE BEING GIVEN THE TINIEST SLIVER OF POWER AND THINKING HIMSELF EMPEROR, BUT CLOSE.

LAST TIME I WENT THROUGH THIS PARTICULAR ROUNDABOUT, THE CHALLENGE WAS DIFFERENT. YOU GOT LOADS OF CALLS, AND QUITE A FEW WERE JUST A WASTE OF TIME. BUT THERE WERE CALLS. AND SOME OF THEM BECAME LONG WINDED HIRING PROCESSES, AND SOME WERE A WASTE OF TIME. BUT THERE WERE INTERVIEWS. THIS TIME AROUND, IT’S GOING THROUGH THE DAILY GRIND OF LINKEDIN, AGENCIES, CIVIL SERVICE WEBSITES, FREELANCING WEBSITES, TALKING TO FRIENDS, AND APPLYING FOR AT LEAST THREE OR FOUR JOBS EVERY DAY. SOME YOU WILL SPEND SOME QUALITY TIME WITH, SOME YOU’LL JUST SHOOT A cv, BUT YOU KEEP AT IT.

THEN IT’S CHECKING EMAILS FOR THE REJECTIONS FROM THE DAY BEFORE. EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM A VARIATION OF ‘YOU WERE FINE, BUT OTHERS WERE FINER. AND THERE WERE TOO MANY FINES FOR US TO GIVE ANY MEANINGFUL FEEDBACK. HEY, WE KNOW HOW MUCH EFFORT YOU PUT INTO IT, GOOD LAD. KEEP TRYING THO.’ I DON’T REALLY EXPECT THAT TO CHANGE, I CAN SEE THAT FOR EACH AND EVERY ROLE THERE’S A FEW HUNDRED, SOMETIMES THOUSANDS, OF APPLICANTS. BUT IT DOESN’T HELP ME EITHER. I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M DOING WRONG, IF ANYTHING, OR IF THE JOB MARKET FOR DIGITAL MANAGEMENT IS JUST INSANE. OR A BIT OF BOTH.

PART OF ME IS VERY WORRIED ABOUT THE ANSWER. WHAT IF MY IMPOSTER SYNDROME WAS RIGHT ALL ALONG? WHAT IF I ACTUALLY MANAGED TO BLUFF MY WAY THROUGH ECOMMERCE FOR 12 YEARS? THAT ALONE SHOULD COUNT AS A SKILL, SURELY. ‘WHAT WOULD YOU SAY IS YOUR STRONGEST AREA?’. ‘FAKING IT UNTIL I MAKE IT’.

BUT THAT CAN’T BE. I’M NOT DOING OPEN HEART SURGERY, OR HELPING ELON WITH HIS ROCKETS. I’M DOING DIGITAL MARKETING AND ECOMMERCE. 12 YEARS AND YOU WILL PICK A LOT OF GOOD STUFF ALONG THE WAY, SO IT CAN’T BE THAT. IT MIGHT BE THAT A COUPLE OF COMPANIES I WORKED FOR WENT DOWN (ONLY ONE OF THEM WHILE I WAS STILL THERE BTW, SO I’M NOT A BAD LUCK AMULET), SO IT’S HARD FOR PEOPLE TO DOUBLE CHECK. THAT WOULD BE TRUE IF I FELT PEOPLE WERE GETTING THAT FAR WITH MY CV, BUT I KINDA DOUBT IT.

SO, WHAT’S LEFT TO DO? PERSEVERE, SURE, AS I HAVE ENOUGH FOR ONE MORE MONTH BEFORE I HAVE TO START SELLING MY BODY. IT WAS GOOD NOT TO GIVE UP THE GYM MEMBERSHIP. AND, ON ADVICE FROM MY JOB CENTRE MAN, I’LL BE DOING COURSES. ai, CODING, CONTENT CREATION, ALL FREE STUFF YOU GET WHEN YOU’RE ON THE DOLE.

AND HOPE EVENTUALLY THE DUMPSTERS WILL CONSUME THEMSELVES, AND THE FIRE WILL DIE DOWN, AND I’LL BE BACK SPENDING MONEY ON UNNECESSARY THINGS.